Teenaged girls might just be one of the most over and underserved demographics in the history of entertainment. Because while there are numerous pieces of media aimed at them, rarely do those pieces feel like they’re actually “seeing” them for more than potential markets for clothing items and merchandisable dolls/figures. So rarely does a work truly exemplify their lives, the most recent example being “Eighth Grade” and now, Adam Sandler (“Billy Madison,” “Uncut Gems”) has brought his own brand of humor and big-heartedness to the material, making it a family matter as well, with the smartly and lengthily titled “You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah.”
The film follows Sunny Sandler as Stacy Friedman, a young Jewish girl looking forward to her extravagantly planned bat mitzvah which she believes will help her have a good future if it goes well. However, after she catches her best friend Lydia, played by Samantha Lorraine, kissing her crush Andy, played by Dylan Hoffman, her life starts to fall apart as one misunderstanding after another begins to befall her right up until her big day. The fatherly Sandler plays her dad Danny, Idina Menzel (“Frozen,” “Uncut Gems”) plays her mother Bree, and the ensemble cast is filled out with the likes of Sarah Sherman, Luis Guzman (“Punch Drunk Love,” Carlito’s Way”), Jackie Hoffman (“Feud,” “Only Murders in the Building”), and Ido Mosseri.
If nothing else, the film proves that the comedic stylings of the eldest Sandler clearly run in the family. Sunny is an absolutely fantastic comedic protagonist, running headfirst into numerous circumstances that provide ample amounts of comedy and learning opportunities for Stacy. Likewise, for his limited role, Adam also owns his scenes, providing a more calm, fatherly performance than his more over the top comedic roles prior. Lorraine is also great, meanwhile Hoffman is really just okay, doing as much “I’m an idiot teen boy” schtick as is required. The ensemble also fills their roles nicely, doing exactly what’s required from a comedic perspective and not much more. Sherman does manage to steal every scene she’s in, which shouldn’t surprise anyone familiar with her work on SNL.
What really comes across in every moment of the film is that director Sammi Cohen (“Crush (2022),” “Kingpin Katie”) and writer Alison Peck (“Uglydolls,” “Work It”) have gone to great lengths to make sure that it feels like an authentic teenage girl experience. While that might not mean it's all “real” or not overexaggerated, the emotions for each scene and moment come across exactly the way they want them to. It’s easy, therefore, to get invested in the troubles of Stacy and Lydia’s friendship and root for them as the film goes on. At no point though do things go anywhere unexpected; this is not the kind of movie that will be playing with your creative expectations. It ends up exactly where you think it will, taking the same route as many tweenaged films have before.
The humor, like most Happy Madison productions, can be wildly hit or miss. Some of it is enjoyably juvenile and silly, playing up the awkwardness of family functions like bat mitzvahs and being a young kid lectured by the adults around you. Other times the awkwardness or gross-out humor goes a step too far. One pivotal moment in the film revolves around a misunderstanding so outlandish that you have to wonder if any real person would actually believe it was intentional, and it takes away from the film’s central nugget of truth.
For all the length of its title, “You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah” is a thoroughly entertaining and honest portrayal of a teenaged girl’s perspective on life and the world. Its various elements don’t always fit together well, but when it’s focusing on that young girl’s experience via Stacy and Lydia, led by the fantastic performances of Sunny and Lorraine, it really is a treat. An uneven, silly, exaggerated treat, but a treat nonetheless. 3.5/5
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